Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Comparison 2.0

About a month ago I wrote this post on my thoughts on comparison and asking for advice on how you deal with the little devil when he creeps into your thoughts telling you that you're not good enough, that you'll never be as successful as someone else, that you are inadequate because it happens to all of us. I think it is something that we will probably continue to experience since this world we live in is so published to social media. But let me tell you one thing that I've learned over this last month time and time again that I've found is so important. You are enough. And it's time that we start believing that about ourselves. I had someone tell me this last Sunday and it was just so unexpected and heartfelt that I broke down in tears right then and there on the spot. So if you need to hear that you are enough, that you are doing ok, that I think you are awesome and that you are doing the best you can, you can come to me and I will tell you that over and over and over again, as many times as you need until you believe it about yourself. I gotchu, girl ;).

I also reached out to you, my faithful followers (LOL), asking for advice on how to beat the comparison rut and I struck GOLD! I need to ask y'all for advice more often because you know what's up!

I've summarized here but I've shared below some of the things that I learned from you about comparison! Also, this is a longer post. I usually try to keep them a little shorter but I could not cut anything from this one so hang in there. It's worth it to read all the way to the end, I promise!

+ "I have to remember that I am building the life I want and that those I compare myself to may not want the same life I want. Or they might, but they are choosing what they think they should do rather than what they want to do. Find the life YOU want and build it on your terms. Stay focused on what you are doing and what will get you where you want to be. You are smart and talented and, above all, genuine and kind. You bring many skills to the table that I find invaluable. And you have strengths and skills you won't know you have until you need them." - My boss at Creative Motion Studios, Natalie Orr-Andrea. #blessed

+ "When I think of comparison, I think of how Heavenly Father made us each individual in the image of himself. This is how we are, this is who we are supposed to be. All we have to do is be the best version of ourselves and that's all that matters. In the end, it really doesn't matter how others perceive you, only Heavenly Father." -Shaylee Farren

+ "I like to think about what my goals are. What I want is to impact those around me. I remind myself that I can't reach that goal by comparing myself to others and adjusting myself to fit their mold. I can't make a difference if I don't realize that I am different. That difference is what gives me the unique opportunity to reach people in a way that they haven't been reached before." - Haley Jacobs from The Long Table Blog (previously called The Sugared Peach Blog)

+ My friend Janeen Dittman said "So I just love the Alison show. One of her episodes is called Confidence is a muscle-Lets WERK it out. It totally helped me appreciate myself more. I love how she ends every episode saying you are already as awesome as you need to be. She's the best." I totally agree! I remember listening to that episode thinking over and over, "YES! This is so true!" Alison gets it. 

+ Another friend reached out and said that when she found herself comparing herself others, she noticed that she was missing out on being present in her own life and being grateful for her circumstances. She took a break from social media and started reading, journaling, and looked for opportunities to serve and found that to help. I love this so much! I'm sure we could all do better at being present in our own lives. 

+ One of my besties and roomies from college, Candace Johnson, mentioned that to beat comparison we need to we need to have a better relationship with our Savior so we can truly understand the unconditional love He has for us and our divine potential! If we can focus on how much our Savior loves us and improving our own self-love, we'll be so much happier! TRUTH!

+ Last but most definitely not least, Rylan Schaffer reached out to share his story and I cried all the way through it when I first read it and as I typed it up. I did summarize a bit here just because it was long but I kept what I felt inspired to share here on my blog. I was so touched by his testimony and I hope you will be too! 

"In life, we all have different trials and struggles. Even though I don't know the purpose of all of the trials in my life, I do know where my heart is before I've been through something and where it is after. My life has completely changed and it's because I've tried to look for what our Father in Heaven wanted from me. I'm not perfect and still have struggles that I go through, but I know and feel in my heart that I am a better more compassionate person because of them. Kind of a funny thing to say for a guy but it is true. 

Comparison is one of the biggest struggles in the world, I think. I have definitely been caught up in it. It's wanting the nicer things that others have all the way up to asking 'Why can't I have a normal little boy that loves to play ball with his dad?' As Grady has grown older I have found myself comparing more than I should have but then one day it hit me! If I focus on that then I lose sight of everything good and beautiful in front of me. Grady's laugh, his smile, his little ways to show me he loves me. How he wants to fight in his own little way every night and the infectious laugh he was would all not be there if what I asked for became reality. Grady has been my greatest trial in life but the best thing in my life and I wouldn't change that for a moment. He doesn't talk or communicate other than grabbing your hand to show you what he wants but he knows how to laugh and have fun. We are so blessed! 

At times it is hard to focus on what we have and how we can make the best of that but I can promise you that when you do, the doors of heaven open and the blessing we receive are out of this world. While on this earth trials will mold us into who we need to be so that we can be an angel in someone else's life so they don't feel alone or lost. I may not understand what someone else is going through in their own trials but because of mine, I understand how tough life can be. As a result, when I know that someone is struggling, I can look for ways to make their burden a little lighter. I use to think that no one else has a clue what I have had to go through and that life isn't fair. Well, I can say I was right and wrong at the same time. I was wrong that no one has a clue because Jesus Christ has been through everything we will ever go through so I know we aren't alone. He understands and is there for us if we let Him be. The one thing I was right about is that life isn't fair. It truly isn't but it was never meant to be fair. Christ has suffered more than all and ultimately died for you and me so that we could live! It isn't fair but he did that for us to make our lives better. 

I live and love every minute with my little boy not knowing how long it will be. I know he struggles every day more than I do but if I can bring a smile to his face then I have succeeded. I have taken that lesson into my life as a whole and try to be there for anyone I see struggling. No longer do I compare anything but look to see what I can do to help. Sure we all have our days and sometimes fall a little but look up with hope knowing that true angels live among us and our Father in Heaven is there to help us back up. Be that angel that Heavenly Father needs to help someone else around you. Look for ways to serve people around you and you will be given the strength to overcome life's trials and you'll be so blessed for it!"

Isn't that powerful? I told you it was gold. To summarize: 

You are unique because you are YOU! God didn't intend for all of His children to be the same. He has given us unique talents, abilities, traits, and qualities and those should be celebrated. Focus on being present in your own life. Be confident and be you because you are enough

Image via Pinterest. 

Thanks for reading today, y'all! I really appreciate your support and love your input so if you have something you would like me to write about or share, let me know. If this post inspired you or gave you some food for thought, I would love it if you shared because sharing is caring, right?

xoxo, Chelan